March 23: Never

Luke 22:54-62
54 Then they seized him and led him away, bringing him into the high priest’s house. But Peter was following at a distance. 55 When they had kindled a fire in the middle of the courtyard and sat down together, Peter sat among them. 56 Then a servant-girl, seeing him in the firelight, stared at him and said, “This man also was with him.” 57 But he denied it, saying, “Woman, I do not know him.” 58 A little later someone else, on seeing him, said, “You also are one of them.” But Peter said, “Man, I am not!” 59 Then about an hour later still another kept insisting, “Surely this man also was with him; for he is a Galilean.” 60 But Peter said, “Man, I do not know what you are talking about!” At that moment, while he was still speaking, the cock crowed. 61 The Lord turned and looked at Peter. Then Peter remembered the word of the Lord, how he had said to him, “Before the cock crows today, you will deny me three times.” 62 And he went out and wept bitterly.

Reflection:
Have you ever found yourself saying something like, “I’ll never do that” or “I’ll never be like that” or “That’ll never be me?” Most of this stuff is trivial, menial things in life like, “I’ll never wear wide-legged jeans and part my hair in the middle.” But sometimes, we make inner vows that affect us deeply. They subconsciously steer our actions. These “I’ll never” statements might sound like this: “I’m never going to be like my dad” or “I’ll never treat my kids like that” or “I’ll never end up like those people.” It’s easy to make these quick judgments and life-changing decisions without our knowing. And though we try with all our might somehow we end up doing the very thing we hate. Just like Paul in Romans 7.

Peter finds himself in exactly this place. Only it doesn’t take him a lifetime to end up where he said he’d never be. In fact, it only takes him a couple of hours, literally six verses to end up denying the very person he has given his life to. He would never deny Jesus… until he does. He weeps bitterly.

Peter’s relationship with Jesus didn’t keep him from sinning. Sin was a choice for him, and it is a choice for us even now. But look at how quickly conviction came. Jesus only had to give him one look, and Peter knew he had done wrong. Not only had he done wrong; he did something he swore he’d never do. It is only in this deep, loving, close relationship with Jesus that conviction comes so quickly and as easily that it’s predicated by a simple meeting of the eyes. Our closeness to Jesus will bring us to Jesus much quicker.

Conviction is a good thing, friends. We want to get to conviction quickly so that we can confess our sins, repent and move forward in forgiveness and freedom. We want conviction to come quickly so that we can meet Jesus on the beach, just as Peter does, and tell him with puffy, red, grief-stricken eyes I love you. I love you. I love you.

Prayer:
Loving God,
We try so hard to do what is right but so often find ourselves doing the very things we vow not to do. But you are gracious and meet us with a loving gaze. Thank you for the gift of conviction, and though it may be painful at first, we’re grateful for the ways you constantly bring us back to yourself. Amen.