Shelby Olive

 

James 1:19-21

19 You must understand this, my beloved: let everyone be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger; 20 for your anger does not produce God’s righteousness. 21 Therefore rid yourselves of all sordidness and rank growth of wickedness, and welcome with meekness the implanted word that has the power to save your souls.

 

Reflection:

Fall is here, which means one thing and one thing only for me: it’s time to watch one of my favorite movies of all time — You’ve Got Mail. There’s this scene that always gets me, where Meg Ryan’s character talks about getting completely tongue-tied in the heat of an argument and that it isn’t until after a big fight that she finally thinks of the perfect words to help her win the fight. If only she could do it in the moment. But then her moment eventually comes, and that’s it. She won. And just as quickly as the flood of victory comes it fades, settling into an all-encompassing guilt and regret. Can you relate?

 

My family has unanimously dubbed me as “the nice one” of all of my siblings. I’m generally pretty patient and good about thinking before I speak. However, my mom has recently started joking that I’m also the one to watch out for — that when I’m pushed too far, I quickly become the meanest sibling. And friends, I’m a little ashamed to say that it is absolutely true. Whenever my tongue finally unties, it unleashes, and I can suddenly access all the right words to say in order to completely diminish someone. Yikes.

 

James’ advice in this passage is cautionary and for good reason: listen and be quick about it. In the heat of the moment, things happen fast. Tempers rise, words start flying out of our mouths, and before we know it, things happen that we can’t take back, no matter how sincerely we may regret it. No wonder James tells us to be quick to listen.

 

Let’s look at the progression here. Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger. When we put listening first, everything else can slow down. It is in this slowing down, the slowing of our speech and of our anger where we can see one another for who we really are—God’s beloved people, created in God’s own image. Instead of fury we find empathy. Instead of regret we can find hope. This quick-listening shows that our fights don’t have to end with regret or with broken relationships but that they can instead be holy ground where people can come to better understand and even love one another.

 

Prayer:

Dear God,

I confess that sometimes I fly off the handle and say some really hurtful things to people I love. For this, I ask for forgiveness. Help me first open my ears and listen and slow down. Help me to look upon those with whom I fight with your eyes. You have called them very good, and so they are. Amen.