Rachel Fisher, Children’s Ministries Communications Specialist

1 Corinthians 4:18-21 (NIV)
18 Some of you have become arrogant, as if I were not coming to you. 19 But I will come to you very soon, if the Lord is willing, and then I will find out not only how these arrogant people are talking, but what power they have. 20 For the kingdom of God is not a matter of talk but of power. 21 What do you prefer? Shall I come to you with a rod of discipline, or shall I come in love and with a gentle spirit?

Reflection:
My sister and I were recently in a shop where novelty mugs were sold. We found one that hit particularly close to home. I laughed out loud and announced what the mug said: “I’m not bossy, my ideas are just better than everyone else’s.” Nodding her head, my sister rolled her eyes and agreed, “Yep, that about sums you up.” 

I unabashedly love being right. Honestly, the thrill I get from winning a debate is equal to none. Perhaps it is being the daughter of an attorney (and having two stubborn parents, for that matter). Perhaps it is my very prominent Enneagram 8 wing. Whatever the reason, I love defeating my opponent by making a compelling case to concession. It is not until the damage is done when I finally ask myself…

Could I be more of a jerk? 

Unfortunately, I often come to this realization too late, leaving me feeling far worse than if I had merely “lost” the argument. More than my desire to be heard and acknowledged, I have a desire to be in genuine, healthy relationships with others. After all, one does not maintain these by making others feel small. So why do I struggle silencing the crazed, competitive voice that kicks in so ferociously, so frequently?

Paul asked the church at Corinth this very same question. The Corinthians were far too wrapped up in their own selfish environment, turning to corruption and judgement instead of seeking the unequivocal pillar of their faith: Christianity requires putting others before yourself.

In order to truly live out our faith, Paul councils we must reject hubris for compassion. In choosing to decimate someone with whom I disagree for the sake of being correct, I am sacrificing the chance to show kindness and respect. In denying someone the opportunity to explain themselves, I am forgoing peace and patience. In declaring myself the victor, I am losing a moment to glorify Christ.

Jesus never said he wanted us to be right at all times; instead, he wants us to love at all times. When we put ourselves first, we leave no room for Christ to work through us. Only when our interactions exemplify the humility of our Christianity can we truly declare ourselves winners.

Prayer:
Dear Lord, I am sorry for the times I pick myself over my peers. Forgive me for my arrogance and bless those to whom I have caused pain. Bless me with the grace of your abundant love so that I may mirror this miraculous goodness. Help me to be strong in my faith when facing temptation. Amen.